Solo Pizza on a Tuesday night

Sunshine.

16c.

On a Tuesday.

In February?!

How good is it to feel a bit of warmth and sunshine on the face?

It feels like we are peeping around the corner and spring is not far away!

It’s been a long time coming.

I’m sure you are desperate to know but I didn’t end up with an M25 services dinner last week. Miraculously, the motorway was pretty clear on the way there (different story on the way home!) so I was in London Colney two hours before I needed to be. I found a very nice Italian off the High Street and treated myself to a pizza for one.

Decent pizza to be fair!

Doing things solo has been a bit of an eye opener in recent years. It’s not something I’d even think to do a few years back.

I went on my first solo holiday last year. I remember telling people what I was planning and there were a few people who couldn’t believe I was going away on my own.

Granted, it’s not everyone but I don’t think not having company should be the reason NOT to do something.

I’m pretty happy doing dinner solo. I’m pretty happy going away on my own. And let me tell you, doing the cinema solo is a game changer!

Last February, a random Thursday morning, I’m watching the new Robbie Williams with the whole screen to myself. Bliss.

My preference, most of the time, is to have company but if I want to do something, I’m quite happy to fly solo.

There is a certain confidence you need with being happy to do things on your own.

And I’m a big believer that confidence is something you breed. You need evidence to show you are capable and often, it’s the first initial step that is the most difficult.

Solo holidaying in the camper in Scotland :)

And I think you can apply that to anything.

Confidence doesn’t usually arrive first. Action does.

We often wait until we feel confident before we do the thing.

Whether that be walking into a gym, booking the class, going on the holiday, sitting down alone in a restaurant.

But confidence is rarely the starting point. It’s the bit after.

Confidence comes from evidence.

Each time you do something that once felt uncomfortable, you quietly collect proof.

Proof that you survived it.

Proof that you handled it.

Proof that it maybe wasn’t as big or as scary as your brain made it out to be.

That first solo dinner feels awkward. The second feels manageable. By the third, you’re wondering why it ever felt like a big deal. (And you’re ordering pudding too!)

Health and fitness works in exactly the same way.

Starting the gym, for example, can feel overwhelming before you’ve even stepped through the door.

You imagine everyone knows what they’re doing.

You imagine you’ll stand out.

You imagine you need to be confident, fit and motivated before you start.

But that’s not how it works.

The confidence doesn’t come from suddenly becoming a “gym person.” It comes from showing up.

Your first win might just be walking through the door. Not a perfect session. Not knowing every machine. Just turning up.

That’s evidence.

The next time, maybe you stay a little longer. Maybe you try one new piece of equipment. Maybe you realise no one is actually watching you.

More evidence.

One of the most useful things you can do, in the gym and in life, is break things down into the smallest possible steps.

Not the ideal version. Not the “I’ll train five times a week and overhaul my diet” version.

The smallest step you can realistically repeat.

Because those small, repeatable steps stack up fast. And every repetition builds confidence, not through motivation but through experience.

Managing expectations matters here too.

If you expect your first gym session to feel amazing, confident and seamless, you’re setting yourself up to feel disappointed.

But if your expectation is simply, “I’ll go, even if it feels awkward,” then anything beyond that is a bonus.

Just like solo travel. Just like solo dinners. Just like sitting in an empty cinema on a random Thursday morning watching Robbie.

Confidence isn’t about being fearless or loving every moment. It’s about trusting yourself enough to try and knowing that even if it feels uncomfortable, you’ll be absolutely fine.

By the way, it took 3 hours to get home (17 miles) on the M25 last Tuesday. It lived up to it’s reputation, after all.

See you next week.